so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Randomize
