can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Randomize
