If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
