So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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