I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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