i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
