but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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