I puked a lego.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize