I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
