He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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