: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
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