You really coming over, don't trick.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
