ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize