im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
my sisters under your porch take her home
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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