Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
