woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Randomize
