Define "chronic" masturbator.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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