I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
