So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
The ass gains better be worth it
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