Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
