I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
