okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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