One girl and one boy is just not enough.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
