are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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