On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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