Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
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