I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
