i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
