I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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