Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
