STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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