the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
