He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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