There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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