she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Randomize
