And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize