Are we in a gay sports bar?
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize
