No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize