i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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