she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Randomize
