Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
You're a waste of cheezeits
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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