I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
