Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Randomize