i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
