hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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