He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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