so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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