im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
