I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
