the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
handjob tips. give me some.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
